When it comes to discussing adoption I only have a few things that I am not willing to share. Everything else I know, think, have learned or felt is available in the open book that is me. All you have to do is ask. This Sunday a friend from church asked me a couple of questions about adoption. The only question I remember that she asked was, "How do you respond when people ask you who River looks more like, you or [DH]?" I know what she really wanted to know was if this type of question bothered me not being his biological mother. However, my response was that I respond the same way any parent would... honestly! I tell them that I think he looks more like DH but I LOVE to hear people tell me he looks like me. We don't have to each contribute 13 chromosomes for him to look like us :) That is what makes this question even more fun for adoptive parents to explore. When you notice ways that your child looks like you knowing you contributed nothing to the way they look it almost makes it that much more exciting to discover.
Now, I throw this out there fully aware that it may fall flat on its face. Spring is starting to finally arrive with warm temperatures, green grass, budding flowers, and snow replaced by rain. The changes associated with the arrival of spring is noticeable everywhere including the blog world. Readership and posting seems to be indirectly related to the increasing temperatures. So, next time you have a few minutes in between trips to the park and bike rides let me borrow a few because I would love to hear some of the interesting/crazy/thought provoking questions that you have been asked as mommies (or daddies, of adopted or biological children). It is funny how many more people come up and talk to you when you are carrying a baby or have an adorable toddler in tow so let me know what you've been asked and how you've responded. Also, if there are any questions you would like to ask me, I'd love to hear those as well. I will post all questions and answers in another post.
Also, I'm curious to see how you all would answer the question my friend from church asked me. Who does River look more like, me or my husband (DH)? I have included a picture of our little family and there is a poll on the right side of the blog for you to cast your vote.
Here is a closeup of River since he is looking up in the family picture.
Thank you!
4 comments:
If she knew River was adopted, the question would have surprised me a bit. I don't know what I would have said. Since Candace is Asian, I doubt I will ever get that question. If I did, I would say, "she looks like her birth parents, but she is stubborn like her daddy."
The most common question I get about adoption is Why China?
THe question I asked that I appreciated the answer more than any other question was, "Is it love at first sight when you meet the child you are adopting." The lady I asked told me no, it was commitment at first sight. However, I fell in love with Candace before I saw her picture. It was solid by the time she joined our family.
I lost the link to your blog, but I'm glad I came across you again. River is beautiful!
Thanks, Lynn! Great questions! And I'm going to add your blog to the list of blogs I follow so I don't lose the link to yours either :)
Oh, I just noticed your blog is set to private. Can I email you to be added?
Well, after I wipe the HUGE smile off my face from looking at that adorable picture of River with his hair sticking out all over ( I hear that this is Cory's favorite way to "style" his hair :))I would have to say I think right now, at 7 months old, he looks like his mommy the most :) You win for now, Jill!
Post a Comment